Thank you NHS for what you've done for us already, so far!

I've posted this on it's own as a Facebook status update previously. I think it needs a bit more signal boost in these dire times when healthcare in England seems to be forced into a corner and the respect shown by the politicians to it is dwindling. I've edited some names out, but otherwise I'm publishing it as is. I'll post another update on what's going on with The Larva later today or tomorrow.

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Today I would like to wholeheartedly thank the medical profession and the NHS. Having just done my morning jab of dalteparin sodium (Fragmin), a moment of reflection on how my quality of life is so much better today than it was before Christmas, when we knew I was pregnant, but hadn't gotten my prescription yet - back when I was living for a few weeks in a constant and ever looming dark cloud of FEAR OF DEATH. Let me explain...

It's now been five years - might even be to the day - when I was given the news of having inherited Factor V Leiden (FVL) from both my parents, making me a homozygous sufferer of high risks.

I found out that while the occurrence of a blood clot is about 1:1000 in normal population, people who'd inherited FVL from one of their parents had the chance of 4 to 8 in a population of 1000. I've won the lottery of having the chances of getting a clot up to 8:100. That is, normal population has the chance of 0.1%, mine is 8%, and that is before you factor (ha!) in being overweight, over 35, and pregnant or using hormonal contraception. If you want a more acute comparison, I'm basically carrying two six shooter revolvers all the time, with one bullet, ready to play Russian roulette of getting a thrombosis.

So, to return to my bedside musings next to my sharps box, slowly filling with used needles, and the small sting and collection of bruises on my stomach... Thank you, nurses and doctors who treated my sister, when she had a blood clot, and tested her. Thank you, nurses and doctors who tested my mother when she was diagnosed with cancer of the bile duct five years ago. Thank you, Outi Silvola-Kallio, the occupational health doctor at Mehiläinen, who saw me and listened to my woes when mother was sick, and agreed to test me as well for FVL. Thank you, Marja Sankelo, haematology expert at TAYS, who wrote me instructions on what FVL means. Thank you doctors who've prescribed me Clexane injections for both my California trips since my diagnosis. Thank you, medical professionals at my doctor's office for taking my foreign paper work seriously and forwarding the information to hospital and the consultant doctor who prescribed me the injections I'm taking daily now, until September. Thank you, friends in medical profession who might have heard me complain about FVL, and ...

Thank you NHS for the maternity exemption certificate. There isn't a day that I'm not grateful for what I've been given. Every day I'm grateful for the British taxpayers, who fund this marvellous system and especially the maternity exemption certificates. Physically it's only a piece of plastic, but the idea of giving pregnant women and mothers of children under 12 months FREE prescription medication and FREE dental care is something Finland should take as an exchange for introducing the world to the baby box of material goods. In Finland, my monthly medication would cost around 210€.

Cat's out the bag!

Welcome new readers! You've probably found your way here because we've finally come out in public that we're having a baby! We put up a Facebook post and it's probably been the most popular Facebook update I've ever done. However, I've been writing a few blog posts before, so you might want to pop down the page and read up what has happened so far... Don't worry, this post will still be waiting for you once you finish reading them.

A few weeks have gone by since the last update and it's time to write another update on how me and Larva are doing. We had a growth ultrasound scan on the 21st of January and got some new pictures of Larva then. Unfortunately things went as I suspected and the technician was unable to do the nuchal translucency (aka NT) measurement, so we had to wait until February 1st (last Monday) to have blood drawn for the quadruple test. The results for it came on Friday with likelihoods of less than 1 to 10000 that there's anything massively wrong, and so we were able to give a go-ahead for those members of the family who already knew, that they can tell others that we're having a baby!

Here I am, 13+5

The due date was now shifted a week earlier than what the previous scan said, so now it's the 23rd of July. Scan and blood test results have been relieving for not only knowing that Larva is doing all right, but also finally being able to go public and as a result being able to ask other recent mummies for advice on what to buy, what to do and what to avoid. I can now *finally* shop for some maternity kit and can really start planning for other purchases. The only purchases I've done so far for specifically pregnant me has been two pairs of non-wired full support bras and an exercise ball, which I plan to keep and use as an office chair after Larva's made The Exit. The only big 'purchase' we've done right after the quadruple test results came in was to book in NCT antenatal classes in May and June.

I've done 48 subcutaneous injections so far. My sharps bin, located between the bed and the bedside table on the floor, is slowly getting filled with used, bent needles. I'm slowly learning to do the injections without a massive bruise and agony and it's not a 10 minute procedure any more. I'm glad, because I do need to keep up with this until September, if for nothing else then for my own sanity and peace of mind.

Sharps bin filling up

Otherwise things are going pretty much as usual. We're still cooking food from the Hairy Dieters books, and I'm still enjoying most of the foods. I still don't have any more nausea or throwing up than what I've had in the first trimester, there's some things that I dislike but nothing new has come on the list, it's mainly just moved up a notch - I downright hate parsnips now when I earlier just disliked them, for example. I still have problems with my lunches, just like I did before I became pregnant, now I just become hungry out of the blue and I get angry really quickly if I don't do anything about it. My sense of thirst has also started to develop to a more natural or normal state to what it has been for the past 30 years. And my sleeping has become worse, but I've had trouble sleeping for years. Until now I've used a rolled up towel under my tummy when I sleep on my side, but I think a maternity pillow is going to be on the shopping list next, right before maternity jeans.

And speaking of foods, I haven't really had strong cravings, apart from once when I cried because I wanted raspberries right now. I just have strong desires for foods, most that I can talk myself out of or have given up on them, only to reminisce every now and then; that is: Finnish food. I want cloudberries, leipäjuusto, rahkapulla, mustamakkara, mämmi, Finnish cottage cheese, Christmas carrot casserole etc. Basically either foods that are impossible to get, even by mail because they'd get bad before arriving to UK, would be available from the Finnish seaman's church in London, or are so laborious to make with all the prep needed (ie. cleaning up the kitchen to make space for prepping) that I've just given up. At least some things, like Finnish sausage, can be substituted without noticeable difference. Polish cottage cheese is quite close to the Finnish, but it's not entirely there. And one thing that's the same world over, that I seem to go through in quantities, is milk. I've had days when I've done my two litres of liquids with milk alone.

Continuing on the subject of foods, I live and die by my daily breakfast of Kellogs Allbran and psyllium fiber with plenty of milk, if you know what I mean...

I've had only a few big mood swings and hormonal emotional breakdowns. Biggest came few weeks ago, when I first cried over someone being mean at me in the Internet, followed by getting upset and crying over the Bear putting his mobile phone on the upstairs balustrade where I could have easily dropped it down the stairs, quickly moving on crying over crying over (yes, this did happen! not a mistake!) a phone that I could've, but didn't drop, while I managed to keep my eyes dry when we told the Grandparents on Christmas, which I felt to be very upsetting... aaaaand finally... crying over the Bear laughing at me for crying over crying over not being as upset when we told the baby news to being super upset about something that didn't even happen. This all happened within 30 minutes...

Glucose tolerance test invite came in the mail few weeks back, and it's scheduled for mid-May. I'll have had at least one ultrasound scan before that. Next midwives appointment is week on Tuesday. I've got no idea what to expect (apart from the obvious joke).

Following big purchases are probably a car seat, the Finnish baby box and a baby carrier of some sort (not a Babybjörn though, for sure!). Furniture will have to wait until we make an active effort in trying to decide how to arrange the house.

For the past week, every now and then, I've been feeling an odd sensation in my lower abdomen, that I could on the first occurrence describe only as if someone had put an effervescent drinks tablet in my tummy, and a few days later as oddly located air. I'm trying very hard to not read too much into this as we're barely on week 16, but suspicions are high...

I think I've spent my remaining energy for today, so I'll just finish by thanking you for reading this far, and hopefully I've not bored you to death. Until next time!

Still pregnant

Ever since my last post, I've had an appointment with my GP, several phone calls to midwives, an ultrasound scan, appointment with a consultant obstetrician, prescriptions issued and my first booking appointment with my midwife. It's been busy time, sorry that I've not blogged!

First up was the appointment with the GP, which was relatively uneventful. He wanted to see my homozygous Factor V Leiden lab results from Finland, but seemed to misplace them almost immediately and I had to resend them the scanned paperwork after calling a doctor about a discharge I didn't know what to make of it. That phone call seemed to nudge some other paperwork through, and I was later contacted by the midwife, who contacted the hospital, who wanted all sorts of paperwork to prove I'm eligible for NHS treatment, and after sorting that out, finally got a scan date, a consultant date and a midwife appointment. Before anything more important happened, I had to go and collect my Bounty pack which also included the 30-page A4-sized Pregnancy Notes-booklet, meant to be filled by me, the midwives and doctors that see me. In comparison to what expectant mothers are given in Finland, this seems excessive and somewhat questionable in data protection sense, as the leaflet has my NHS number, phone number, home address, health details...

So, what has been found?

Despite what I was first told by a group of midwives, I did eventually have an early scan on NHS. The due date was shifted by a day, and now it's 30th of July. I had a consultants appointment on the Tuesday after, just before Christmas, and as predicted, I was put on Fragmin, a 7500IU low molecular weight heparin injected subcutaneously, as prophylaxis against blood clots, and a baby dose of aspirin. I'll have extra ultrasound scans in the later pregnancy, I'll have a glucose test to check if I've got gestational diabetes, and some visits at the hospital.

So far I've had a week of injections and my stomach feels and looks like a pin cushion. I've not yet found the rhythm of doing it nonchalantly - I hesitate and flinch every time I need to inject. This happy activity will continue more or less until September.

We told the immediate family about the forthcoming family occasion on Christmas Day. Lots of tears were shed. We even have some video from the moment, but not publishing that quite yet :-D We asked everyone to keep the news to themselves for a few weeks more, until the second ultrasound scan. My Christmas meals included beetroot and blue cheese bake, gravlax I cured myself after freezing the fresh salmon for four days, turkey, IKEA ham, roast potates, hard cheeses and trifle. I did longingly look at everyone eating heaps of chicken liver pate, but didn't partake past a teaspoonful to try the recipe.

We had to return from the inlaws for the booking appointment with the midwife on Tuesday. It was fairly uneventful as well. Three tubes of blood were drawn, some of the booklet filled and forms filed in. I also requested a sharps box for my used needles. I do wonder why it has been so difficult to get one, hasn't yet dawned on me.

I've not had much nausea and absolutely no throwing up yet. However, in the past few weeks my appetite seems to have increased several folds, as I get hungry almost immediately after a meal. This makes trying to keep my weight where it is a bit difficult...

Anyway, that's it for now. Hopefully my fatigue and hunger pangs allow me to write again, maybe a little bit sooner.

Doctor's appointment booked, some shopping done

Two weeks ago on Sunday, week ago Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, last Tuesday

I booked a doctor's appointment on Wednesday for next week. To my surprise, The Bear wanted to come too. Well, I don't suppose it's really a surprise, I just personally don't expect much of the event as I know I'm a high-risk first time mother and in all likelihood the doctor will just refer me to the closest hospital with a specialist on haematology. It's delightful that he's so interested. I'm mostly just terrified for now, and I suspect I will be until the first trimester is over, if we ever even get there.

This morning I got the first email update from Start4Life, a webservice ran by NHS, about how the baby is developing, and what to do. Found it very comforting.

An acquaintance posted a picture from a wall in a maternity ward in a hospital in Helsinki, on Facebook yesterday. It was so bizarre - apparently on the first few weeks of pregnancy the mother 'reverts to her own time in the womb and curls into herself and her emotions'. My personal reaction to that was 'What the flaming f**k?'. I certainly don't feel like a sesame seed sized dot, or coughing up amniotic fluid from my lungs. If anything, I'm doing very adult kind of worrying, like how are we going to cope with a baby when I sometimes can't cope with making myself a bowl of cereal, and how are we going to arrange the bedrooms, when the second biggest bedroom (aka Pink Room, also Guest room) in our house is taken over by a double bed and stuff moved from the third bedroom (aka Office, or Box room) as we're in process of clearing it to be a home office...

I've tried to learn how to drink more liquids (obviously both non-alcoholic and caffeine-free) and to that goal I've bought an app to remind me to drink more, and to keep a tally on how much I've drank. In a week I've gotten bored of all sugar free high juices we've got in our house, and I'm doing a good job in developing new dislikes, too. I've axed saccharin from my decaf coffee and moved over to sucralose. All the effect a morning cup of joe has had on me before has clearly been either placebo or the morning ritual, as I haven't noticed any kind of difference in my alertness what so ever to normal coffee. I can by the way recommend Taylor's of Harrogate's Decaf coffee - if I didn't know from the package it's decaf, I wouldn't know it from the taste either. I've also purchased some plain redbush tea and Yorkshire Decaf normal tea into our cupboard. I'm unsure if the normal decaf tastes much different because it's decaf, or because it's not a hard water blend which we normally drink.

Talking of teas, I've started a taste experiment with the redbush teas in desperation of expanding my drinks selection. I made an IKEA glass carafe of Tetley's Pure Redbush, some lemon essence and some sucralose tablets yesterday, and another with two bags of a Finnish teablender Nordqvist's Moomin Redbush tea, one flavoured to be 'strawberry milkshake', both to be drank as iced teas. I'll report later how that went.

And returning to the drink reminder app, The Bear and I finally ordered me a Moto 360 watch last night, and it has already shipped from China. The drink reminder app is Android Wear compatible, so I should be getting reminders to drink onto my wrist in a few weeks. I also spent a good amount of time looking at different pregnancy tracking apps yesterday, but I'm unsure if any of them are any good. None of them are compatible with Android Wear. At least I'll have a bit more precise watch than what I've got now.

Talking of shopping, Wednesdays's Amazon Lighting Deals had us buy the first thing for the baby, now that we know we're expecting. (I participated in Hello Ruby's Kickstarter project to get a geeky computer science book for our hypothetical children to read already last year, so it doesn't really count) They had a great deal on a 12-pack of white plain muslins, so we went and ordered it. I can always use muslins for draining my concoctions, if no other use is found for them.

I also ordered a fairly expensive maternity bra from Figleaves few days ago. My breasts are achy at times and almost all the other bras feel uncomfortable when that happens. Sadly the comfy bra I have is also the most expensive pair that I bought for the wedding, so I can't keep wearing them with with wilful abandon every day for the rest of the pregnancy. I'm hoping they'll arrive today. Of course now the same bra is on sale - good thing I used all the discount voucher codes I could find when I ordered, otherwise I would have been mightily disappointed.

That's all for today, thank you very much for reading!